How LONG can you HOLD someone?

1577th BLOG POST -->>

Every time we find someone very close to us, whenever we are out to pray, we ensure that we are also asking goodwill for them. We want them to stay better and safe always. Even if one is selfish and only asks for himself but do not consider well for people around him, he/she can never be happy because in your happiness, you always need another happy person to celebrate the occasion. If you do not have anyone, you stay unhappy even after achieving everything of this world. We have seen cases where in a group of friends, only one friend passes the exam while others fail, that one candidate is unable to celebrate the moment because the people around him/her are not happy with their results or lives.

Hence, it’s a human tendency to wish well for everyone who is close to him/her along with being selfish and thinking first about ourselves. There can be few exceptions for sure. There are many a times when you find someone close to you going on a path that’s risky and you want to stop him/her but the person is adamant about trying the same. You are just praying day and night and pleading the person to change his/her decision but the person doesn’t give any heed to your suggestion or advise and continues with the proceedings of this dangerous  job that he/she is entering into. The most that you can do is emotional blackmailing in the end but the question is for how long can you hold the person?

How much right do you have over the decision-making and decision-executing rights of that person? Do you own the person? Does the person consider you God to follow everything you feel is right for him/her? I have seen my friends taking wrong decisions in professional life in spite of getting several suggestions about continuing/discontinuing their present job. I have seen my friends taking education lightly even when they were lectured daily about the money their parents are spending on them. I have seen my female friends going for picnic with boys who have planned to drink even when they know the happenings taking place all over the country. I have seen my couple friends breaking up even when they could have become the best partners ever for each other just because of their ego.

But is there anything we can do more than only giving suggestions to these close people we have in our lives for whom we cannot think negative as much as we want? We will have to come to the conclusion that we do not have the destiny of anyone in our hands and we are not liable or eligible to hold the happiness of anyone. Each person takes their own decision, passes or fails accordingly, and becomes a rich or poor person in terms of both- money and quality of life respectively. We can only pray for their best but thinking that we can put restrictions or ban on someone from taking a decision and then even executing is wrong. We can take only our care. These days, even children do not listen to parents who almost own them so what are friends, siblings or colleagues to stop someone from going on the track which will only lead to failure.

I have become wrong several times just to explain someone what is  the ultimate right thing for that particular action they are about to take considering whatever knowledge I have in that area. Rather than listening to me, we ended up in dirty arguments which almost came to the level where the relationship was about to be called off. Why should one take such path when you can be friends with that person for lifetime irrespective of whatever the quality of life that person is leading? But personally speaking, I do not like sharing my space with anyone who is not worried about the quality of life they need to live. If they are just happy with the short term happiness of drinking, smoking, chilling, hanging-out with dangerous buddies, taking worthless decisions out of superiority complex or ego etc., they do not have place in my most inner circle where I want to keep only the special people of my life.

Doing wrong just to say that you needed to experience it to know how it is is the most foolish thing I have ever heard. And I would only suggest everyone to not bear such foolishness around you for the sake of peace of your own mind. And remember, we cannot hold anyone any longer. They are a full set of flesh and blood of their own and let them go with their heart and mind. Just sit back and watch the show after intimating them for once about the dangerous path they are about to walk into. That’s all I had to say.

Thanks.

ABHILASH RUHELA!!!