Does "relationship" change our Living Attitude?

1575th BLOG POST -->>

The relationships in a human being’s life make him/her whatever they are in terms of sociability and communication. But is carrying a relationship that easy for which one can try to indulge in one just like that? I don’t believe so. One of the most difficult things to do is to decide if we should escalate the relationship level with a person to the next stage. You never know what might occur tomorrow which may change the relationship patterns which the two of you share between yourselves. Today, the need of getting involved in a relationship with someone might sound the only alternative but what if tomorrow makes it one of the burdens in your life?

I have seen people dying every day because they are unable to either break off with a person or continue with such stressful bonding. Their life has become hell because of this dilemma which would not have been part of their life if they had not chosen to build any kind of relationship with that person. When I say relationship, I mean every kind of relation that exists in this world between two people- Friendship, blood relation, love affair, marriage etc. Any kind of relation can give you immense pain or pleasure. I have used pain before pleasure because we often do not notice the pleasures we get from a person but pain gets so much imbibed in our personality that we are unable to become the person we once were.

If I have been in a friendship with someone where I ended up being cheated, my first thought after liking someone would be- Should I give this new person the space I gave to the previous one who broke my trust? But the immediate reaction to this thought is to become defensive and protective about our self. Now, rather than thinking about what might be the result of our association with this new person, we start comparing the person with the person who gave us immense pain. And that leads to loneliness again and more depression because we see an opportunity in front of us but we are unable to take a chance even though our mind, soul and body are getting attracted towards it.

Our personality is not what only we have motivated it to become but it is also accumulation of all the relationships we had in our life. It leads to certain memories and those memories lead to certain decision-making parameters under which we always act after we get in touch with a new person. The decision to enhance the decoration of the relationship by mooting the person to a little more inner circle of our life is the biggest decision, I feel, one takes. Even though the complexities involved in this is not clearly visible but it affects our life, somehow, later on.

Please make sure that whenever you are about to fall in relationship with a new person, be ready to explore the several dimensions of emotions that it will bring with itself and make it change you in the process of it. Your thought process will never be the same as it has been till date. It is now going to consider even their thoughts on every decision that you will take in your life. Somewhere you would want to impress or consider even their opinion on whatever you do with your own life. Either small or big changes, their presence in your subconscious mind are a surety. Think hundred times before building a new relationship with anyone. Even while selecting a Sutta-partner, think that a sutta only takes 2 minutes of your life but this person might take away the whole pleasure out of your life. I am not scaring but focusing on difficult part of involving with another human being in this human life which is actually meant to create equilibrium of loneliness and detachment throughout. Best of luck for the next time you decide to make a stranger a big part of your life.

Thanks.

ABHILASH RUHELA !!!