Tumhe Sub Kuch Pata Tha Na, Maa ???

            559th BLOG POST -->>

       I was in 6th std when my mother said it for the first time that she wants me to be a Music-director. I asked her what does this means. And she described me everything about music-direction including the names of all the instruments that are used to create music, the number of taals, sargams and surs required for creating a perfect song, different kind of songs with their typical names, the big names of legendary music-directors etc. I was excited to know about Music-direction. I liked her choice which she decided for her son to be. I was just 11 years old and hence, I didn't took it seriously. My father died when I was developing in the womb of my mother. I never ever saw my father neither did my father saw me. And hence, my mother loved me twice than your mother would be loving you as she found a little presence of my father in me. She believed in reincarnation. Right from my childhood, I only saw a security in my mother's arms. Hence, whatever my mother used to say, I never refused her. That is why, when she desired me to be the Music-director of this dreamy Bollywood world, I didn't say atleast once that what is this and why should I do this just because you want me to. My mother was and is my only life.


            Years passed, and now I was in 10th std. My mother already made me learn harmonium and piano. I also had a certificate of a diploma in basic music direction. My mother used to work on sewing machine day and night to earn money so that she can can fulfill all my dreams and her dreams attached to me. When I was learning Music direction, I enjoyed it a lot. It is an interesting talent to create musics which has never been played before, heard before or even thought of before. As the absence of my father always made my mother weak and sick, I used to create only happy music so that she can chill. I never made her hear any of my sad notes. She always asked me to be versatile rather than creating only happy environs. Even after her incessant accusation of me being a stereotype, I never made her hear all my notes to prove that I am the most versatile creator in the class. For the next two years, I attended this classes and in the end I had the certificate of being a Music-director with A+ grade. This qualified me to get a job of music-direction easily in any of the B-grade movies. 


            Then, my 12th std board exams came and I left the classes even when my mother said that I have potential of managing both the things simultaneously and scoring honors in both. But I never gave a thought to what she said. I wanted to complete my studies because I loved learning new concepts. Music also thrilled me but not to that extent for which I could have boycotted studying or my academic career. I always had a doubt on these kinds of talent-based jobs where audiences decide our fate. At least in my academic career, I can blame myself if I don't succeed in future. But in this talent-based jobs, once people get bored of you, your career ends and you get humiliated in front of all your friends, family and huge mass of fans. Finally, I cleared 12th std with 82% which was the highest ever scored by anyone in the colony where I lived. I wanted to go for Engineering but my mother compelled me to opt Bachelors in Music. I remained topper for all the 6 semesters. I also started creating my own compositions. In 900 days of college in 3 years, I created some 1400 compositions which was like a dream for other students to do. One can't create one composition and I had 1400 compositions under my name, each of 5 minutes. My mother used to listen all of them and review it. She was my personal guide. The one she used to say is worst, without giving a second thought to it, I used to delete it or recreate it. My mother was too happy to see that her son is turning out to be what she always dreamed for her son. 


             After the completion of my Bachelors, my mother asked me to go and try for some jobs in Ekta Kapoor's serials. She had a belief that you can't reach at the top directly, for that you will have to climb the ladder from the first step itself. I told her that I am not ready to struggle now. Neither was I interested in migrating to Mumbai as I heard that there's a lot of Gundaraj there. I was happy to be in Gwalior. I kept creating music at home. For 3-4 hours, I used to sit at my mom's boutique and help her with sewing so that we can earn more. As I knew that I wasn't still ready to go and earn, I will have to do something to lighten the weight on my mother's shoulder. This kept on happening for the next 3 years. My mother started getting weaker and weaker. I never realized it because I tried to ignore the fact that this was happening because of me. I was thinking only one thing is those days- Why should I struggle to be the one when there are already so many music-director working in the industry? Who will give me a chance? And there's a long life ahead, I will become one after composing 10,000 compositions. Why should I hurry? And therefore, I ignored the fact that my mother was finding this undigested. 


            One day, my mother met with a heart-attack and she was admitted to the hospital. Doctor said that the situation is critical. The only thing which could help in recovery would be some very great good news or an achievement which has been her dream from a long time. I knew what she wanted to hear. I told doctor about it and he said that it would take a very long time for me to achieve a tag of Music-director in the country. He told me about an injection through which he can send my mother to coma for a long time. It was helpful as the operation needed lots of money and I didn't had any. I and mom only had what we earned from the boutique. That wasn't enough. Keeping a big rock on my heart, I told doctor to send her to coma until and unless I don't get to the position. That was the last minute when I sat quietly. I took all those 8900 compositions which I created in the last 6 years. I patented all of them. Now, these were my official tunes. I released them on Youtube.com and other musical websites. Initially it took time, but within a month every tune started getting millions of hits. Then, I met a rock band which used to create sad songs in a very delighted mood. I asked them if they would add lyrics to my compositions and sing it. They agreed. I started working with them day and night. I told them about my mother's case and they showed affection as she was just not mine, but even their mother. 


            Now, we started uploading our own composed romantic songs on Internet. We became stars of the nation. Youngsters started loving us. We became the heart-throb of the nation. Now, even I was added in their rock-band. We started earning a lot as the number of audiences was 20 times more than what their band used to have before. Finally, one day, I got a call from Mahesh Bhatt asking if I would like to compose music for his next movie starring Emraan Hashmi. I cried a lot that day in happiness. It was already 8 months since my mother was in coma. One night, I read her diary which she always kept hidden from me, she had written a detailed scenario of how my father wanted to be a music-director but he couldn't because of his early death. And this is why she wanted me to be the one as she believed my father reincarnated in me. And hence, the speed of my work towards being a music-director accelerated like hell. Finally, the name of Emraan Hashmi and Mahesh Bhatt made our song album reach No.1 in all the charts. The radio channels started taking my interviews. The media used to roam everyday near my home. I started getting numerous offers. In next 3 months, I composed 35 songs for 8 movies. And I became the only composer to give 35 hits in just 3 months.


           Doctor already started retreating my mother the day I got that offer from Vishesh movies. I told them to start bringing my mother back to consciousness so that I can give this happy news to her. It took 2 more months for doctors to bring my mother back into consciousness. Till then, I won awards for the Best Music-director in almost all the award functions. One day, finally, doctor gave me a good news that my mother will open her eyes today. I sat with all my awards in her ward. As soon as my dear mother opened her eyes, she saw me. She was excited but she couldn't show it because of weakness in body. I showed her all the awards that I won. I also showed her videos on my Samsung notepad. Without any movement in her body, she had just 2 things which proved that she was alive in utter happiness- tears of happiness in her eyes and a wide smile on her face. I hugged her. And I cried a lot. Finally, her hands moved and she showed me a Thumbs up. I started weeping like hell. And then, her hands fell down. My mother died. The soul of my body went away with her. After this, I have only composed sad songs. My sad songs are the Top on Bestsellers' chart. I just can't think of any happiness without my mother. But, I am India's Best Music-Director today with almost all the records in my bag. 


P.S.: Don't take time for granted. There are some dreams of our parents for which they depend on us. You don't know what may happen the very next moment. If your parents will die before you fulfill their dream, you will never be able to forgive yourself and laugh from heart throughout your life. In this story, protagonist at least got a chance to tell his mother that he has accomplished her dreams but may be we won't get chance. Life is too short to ignore big things. Start doing big things in life. Value Time. And Value Parent's dream too. You just don't know when a bad news may drop in.


 Thanks.


 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU