Jo Mera Ho Nahi Paaya Wo Tera Ho Nahi Sakta !!!

            528th BLOG POST -->>

       One of my friend in class has fallen in love with another friend of the class and he keeps asking her to accept his proposal. It has been 1.5 years since this process has been stuck at the same stage. He keeps begging and she keeps replying "Aage badho". :-) The result of this Love has been the inclination of the boy towards Cigarettes, alcohols and irresponsible life. He has almost got a year drop because of his foolish love for her. And the effect on the girl is 0. She is happy with her life, family and friends. She has no concern for that boy. She is scoring fine in academics and she is improving her personality every day. She was known to be short-tempered but today, I can see a very good controlling power in her. But the boy was perfect in the first year of graduation. He was the best logical person when it came to coding programs and softwares. He was the best person when it came to maintaining sincerity and socialism. But today, everyone talks about how he has turned his favorable life into an unfortunate one. People feel pity for him but no one gives him sympathy. Because, it is he himself who have wasted his life just because he loves a girl like a baby loves his mother. But, then, who can be loyal like mother? This is what young generation's boys don't understand.


           I have asked the boy to stop following her and start following his career and studies, she will automatically come to you once he gets a good job and living standard. But every sentence of mine is as useless to him as Lalu Prasad Yadav's speech in the Parliament. I know that I have the potential of influencing someone. :-) But here I have failed to change his ideology about the girl because that's not Love which he has for her, its just an extreme OBSESSION. He just wants to own the girl. He wants the girl to be his in any condition. He is ready to wait for 10 years or even 20. He is ready to quit his family, religion and friends for her. He is ready to go to any level for impressing and getting her. There's a difference between enforcing someone to be with you and winning someone to love you as you love them. And when you do the latter one, you become inspiration for everyone but if you do the former one, you become an evil for the person you enforced to be with you and for everyone who saw you doing that. But when there is an OBSESSION, your brain stops functioning in the right direction. :-) 


           I remember my period when I was intrigued into a girl for a long time. I had no other work in my life than checking my mobile after every 30 seconds if a message popped in or not. Even when my mobile used to be on the General mode and I knew that a Ringtone will ping me as soon as a message will fuck hard my mobile, I used to check considering that a fault would have arisen when her message would have came. This is how I kept augmenting my obsession and one day, when I came to knew that she left me and she is never going to talk to me again, I broke up. I cried like hell. I cried so much that after a moment, even tears refused to show up. I got addicted to Google chat too as we used to chat for 6-7 hours daily. I didn't had Internet at my home then. So, I used to go to Cyber Cafe to talk to her. But, after she left me, I didn't stopped visiting Cyber Cafe. I used to sit there for 7 hours daily and exactly at that time when we used to chat. She never came Online and the only thing which used to rule my Monitor screen was the Google chat Application. And the other one thing which used to be there was ORKUT where I used to update about how sad I am and how much I am interested in ending my life. I used to do nothing except sitting idle in the Cyber Cafe and waiting for her for 7 hours. Reason of wasting this precious time of mine was OBSESSION FOR THAT GIRL.


            Coming to the girl whom my friend is trying to enforce to be with him- She used to like one of our seniors who was of her caste. Initially, she thought that as caste is not a problem and as he is single too, she may achieve him very soon. But the fate has something else. The boy never gave a look to her even when he knew that the girl is mad for him. He never ever tried to tell her that she is no one for him. He kept doing this for 1.5 years with her. Finally, one day he said YES. Everyone of us knew that he replied positively because he wants to pass his time with her and leave when once done. But she never thought in the same manner because she was OBSESSED for him. She just wanted him. She was Okay even if he showered fake love for her but she wanted his love anyhow. At last, he left her and he insulted her every time when they were in relationship because he knew that she will bear all because she is obsessed. This resulted in her health, attitude and academics badly. I always felt bad whenever I used to see her crying like anything. But Solution? NULL. Because OBSESSION RULED HER. 


           Today's young boys and girls should understand that Love is not about showing obsession or getting obsessed with the person you love. Loving someone is far different than getting Obsessed for them. If you love someone, you can see her getting her hands pampered by her male friends because you know that your love is strong but if you are obsessed, you will get short-tempered and you will hurt yourself after seeing her hand getting rubbed with someone else's hand. You will not even hurt her for this because you are obsessed for her. You can harm the world but you will never harm her. If you love someone, keep in mind that your happiness should be in the person's happiness and not in your happiness. And your Love should be Unconditional. You can never enforce anything on the person you love. You should be happy in whatever they give you- Either Love or Hatred. I am happy with my Ex-gf with whatever she gave me because I never obsessed her, I always loved her. Once, I saw that she likes getting touchy with boys, I accepted her in that way. Once, I saw that she wants to break off with me, I let her go without even asking the reason. Once, I saw that she don't even want to meet me, I stopped all my interactions with her. Because, I killed my OBSESSION long before when that girl fooled me. This time I made it sure that I will not carry any obsession for this girl. And see, today she is carrying a baby with her husband and I don't have any problem. :-) 


          Enough said. I know I have used OBSESSION for numerous times above. Forgive me for that. :-) I just want people to be happy in love rather than getting hurt every another minute. 


          Thanks. 


 ABHILASH RUHELA - VEERU