SALMAN JANJIRKAR SPEAKS (Member's Post) !!!

            Member's BLOG POST -->> 

             I am sure that all of you remember Salman Janjirkar - member of ARB. He committed to post 1 to 2 articles per month on my blog for everyone of you but because of some personal problems he was unable to do so. After a long time he sent me this post to me and I was quite shocked to read the post. I never thought that Salman would really write about this but once when he has opened one of the envelope of his life I am sure that many more are yet to come. Salman, I am waiting for more such posts from you. Now, I would not like to waste your time as you may be curious for reading Salman's words by now. So here it is :-


FOREWORD BY SALMAN :
  
             Here I am once again!!

       It’s been some time since you all heard from me...

            I know most of you might be thinking that I had committed to write monthly articles for Veeru but didn’t follow up on it… the reason for this---- I have, I guess, made Veeru understand the obstacles faced by during this ‘PERIOD OF ABSENCE’.
       
            Many of my friends have asked me to write about my personal life and experiences for quite a while now. For those who don’t know me, the thing is that I am essentially an introvert. I take time to open up to people and very few of them are like that and they are very special and important for me...

 The last two years of my life have been in turmoil...

So here I will try to express myself, my problems and if possible set my inner demons free!!

  
THE DARK AGES !!!

           Last year I took a step, which I think shall have a drastic (hopefully positive) effect on my future and of my family’s.

          I was a student of engineering pursuing a bachelor of Electronics in one of the so called ‘PREMIERE INSTITUTE OF MUMBAI’….. I suffered two drop years….. Not that I am dummy or so! Just to get the facts straight I have always scored above 80% throughout my high school… scored 86.something in My SSC with 2 months worth of study, 71 in my HSC with hardly umm… 25 days worth of study..

           So study was not an issue for me and also I scored 59.something in my 1st semester examinations...

           What I guess caused this downfall is certain incidents which shook my very existence. 1st and foremost I lost some people whom I would have trusted my life with... My best buddies and I went off on a rampage to literally destroy each other! Second my dismal performance academically made me lose confidence in myself, which is I guess the worst thing that can happen to anybody!

            I completely loss my focus and became a soul-less body… became a man who had lost his reason for survival for whom the very reason of existence had been forgotten… but the only thing which kept me from going insane was the timely reunion with my buddies (initiative was taken from their sides for which I am eternally grateful to them) and the thought of my FAMILY… My wonderful family! For which I thank Almighty Allah eternally to provide such an insolent creature like me with such wonderful support system….

            If kindness could kill I would have been long dead, maybe burning in hell! I never can imagine a family so supportive, so caring! No questions were asked! When I said I had lost my focus they accepted it that way said ‘Beta jaan hai to jahaan hai, nothings more important than you!!’So here they shifted to Mumbai along with me to provide moral and emotional support and yet once again I disappointed everyone… I got another drop!! This one really shook me as even I could not fathom the reason for it... it seemed that I had completely lost my sense of reality and direction in life… however my wonderful support system of family and friends got me out of that ‘Abyss’ I was lost in and made me whole again..

            The decision I took to shift to commerce was accepted immediately by all… but somehow I felt their disappointment and it killed me every time I saw the hurt in their eyes when anyone questioned about me….. But maybe this was to act as the catalyst in my recovery! I took seriously to the task ahead of me... though formidable but it aint unachievable! I still got years ahead of me! I shall stand up to the challenges that come ahead of me and fulfill the promises I made…. And by The Great Lord above no one can stop me now!!

            So here I might like to mention a few people who have helped me rediscover the ‘SALMAN’ whom I had forgotten and lost track of…

            My Great Buddies – Fahad Bodhle a.k.a. Appu , Muskaan Malani, Nowman Sawal a.k.a. Nomi, Niraj Patil,Ronesh Nikalje And Baakir Cherawala----- because if it wasn’t for you guys I don’t know where I might be today.. The invaluable support you all gave to a wretched creature like me was simply… I got no words to express what I feel and want to say….

            And though I might never express it in your face But I Love You Very Much My Family!!---Pappa, Mummy, Appi, Mumma and Abbu—especially Mummy, Abbu and Appi—You guys have believed me everytime I have been down and yet somehow I have never lived up to your expectations and though sorry seems to be the hardest word for me to say I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me and begin fresh anew….

            Well guess I have almost poured my soul out and am feeling good already!

            I have been carrying this load on my heart for quite a while now, but now its lightened and maybe I can learn to live again, to hope again, find the magical touch which made me successful and cheerful….

            Thank you all for listening out to me

            I remain, as ever

Salman “The Master Of Disaster” Janjirkar

Ciao!!